Tuesday, February 16, 2010

lover list

I was going to write this as a Valentine's post. However, my computer is broken and I have a really stuffy nose. It's ok, you don't need a holiday to write about love.

My Ramona was born in the morning on May 1st. My mom told me later that as she held her she realized that it had been a very long time since she had added anyone to her "lover list".

A lover list is something my sister invented when she was very small. It was essentially an existential kind of list of people that she loved. It was mainly used as a reward or a punishment. "You are NOT on my lover list!" or "You are number one on my lover list!"

Last year, 2009, was a big year for love. Five weeks after Ramona was born, my nephew was born. This means that on top of all the things that I am, I'm also an aunt. Aunt Nono. He is the sweetest, cutest, nicest little boy. One baby is cute, two babies is crazy cute. They are beginning to act like cousins. They steal things out of each other's hands, they follow each other around. It's a baby party.

My family is better than it has ever been. The birth of my nephew has been one of the most profound things that has ever happened to me. He has shown me how to let go and love. He has shown me that the situation doesn't have to be perfect and it's not my job to control everyone. And, he has introduced me to my sister.

I have never had much in common with my sister. Getting to know her now, as a fellow mother, has given us this safe, common ground to become actual sisters and friends.

Happy Belated Valentine's, D&D.

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