Friday, March 25, 2011

that's my heart in there

I've been writing a lot. But not on this blog. What I have been doing is finishing my thesis, for real. It went from being an impossible burden, to a list of things I'm crossing off one at a time. Sometimes I look at what I've written and it's strange to see nothing of myself on that page. Even if I squint, I can't see myself in there. I wonder if it is possible to put your heart into academic writing?

See this picture? This is me, in front of the library at my University at the start of my graduate program.
I love this girl. This non-mother person. This hard working, small dreaming girl.

I'm not that girl anymore. I have huge dreams. I have so much counting on me. But still, I can write a poem. And then another. I'm going to write a book. A text message. A letter. I'm going to write the thing that makes your heart sing, yearn, hurt, take refuge. I'm going to make you feel more like yourself. Because see, I'm writing my favorite story. And so are you. Get out a pencil, see if you aren't.

It is all wide open now. Let's wash a floor. Let's make some art. Let's make some heads shake.


  1. Nice to get a little inspiration on a Saturday afternoon!

  2. Neil, I really appreciate that, because I admit I fretted that I was a bit manic and "sheen-ish" in this post. I just wish with all my heart we could all not worry so much about people getting us wrong. I know it keeps me up at night.

  3. Reflecting your decision..."It is the seeker's life. It can be a life of incredible hardship and sacrifice. But there is a kind of joy in being in sync with your nature, with a sense of purpose."

  4. Brooke, I'm a honey badger. The honey badger doesn't give a shit, she's totally high off the joy of being a honey badger. And eating cobras. And writing poems.

  5. Uh-oh, Nova has a new anthem.